Reaching the UnreachedAn annual conference for churches trying to reach out in the hard places of our land

Yesterday I took my two eldest kids to play in the new playground that’s literally 2 metres away from our front gate! We hadn’t been out there for more than 5 minutes when a loud, violent row erupted between 2 men in a neighbouring house (apparently over drugs). The entire park full of kids (including my own) seemed to stop whatever they were doing as they listened to a tirade of threats and verbal abuse along the lines of “I’m going to rip your f___ing head of you f____ing C___!!” I tried to get my kids back home so as not to expose them to such aggression, but by the time we got to the gate the row was over.

The damage was done.

We stayed in the park for about half an hour afterwards and as I was getting ready to take the kids home I was shocked to find my 4 year old little girl sat under the climbing frame scrawling her name on the equipment. She was with an older girl who she insists had put her up to it. I cleaned the graffiti off (the first to be done in the new park) and went home shell-shocked! Only a week earlier some friends from church had taken my daughter out to play in the park on a sunny Sunday afternoon, only to leg it back to the house with her a few moments later saying: “It’s all kicked off out there, there’s men fighting with metal bars and all the kids are screaming and crying…it’s nuts up here!!”

The reality of what it means to raise my precious kids on a deprived council estate is really starting to sink in. So I guess this post serves 2 purposes.

The first is to flag up the very real implications of living on the frontline and seeking to raise a family there! There are many challenges to reaching the unreached incarnationally (I know that’s probably not the correct theological definition, but it’s very early and I can’t think of a better one right now!) However, I think that this is one of the toughest to deal with. When our car got broken in to and written off, when abusive graffiti was being written about me, when I had to run outside to stop a bloke stamping on a girl’s head, when I found a guy in a field about to top himself with a shotgun…I’ve honestly found all of that easier to process and deal with than what happened yesterday! I guess the reason for that  is that I understand the call that God has placed on my life and I understand the cost attached. I dealt with it, none of it affected my kids so it seemed OK. Furthermore, I also have a relationship with God and know what it is to receive grace from Him to help me stand strong.

But what about my kids?

I’ve got 4 kids under the age of 5 who are now living in a world very different to the one I grew up in – and they haven’t even reached primary school yet! I confess that there are times that I question whether it’s appropriate or even loving to raise my kids in such a rough environment. Ultimately I always arrive at the same conclusion – yes it is! Here’s a few reasons why:

• I’m convinced that God has called me. I am in no doubt that I’m doing the right thing in the right place at the right time. If He called me, then surely He called my family too and will give them the grace that they need, just like He gives me the grace that I need to endure.
• The darker the environment the more radiant the light shines! It’s my prayer that as my kids grow up they will see the darkness and destruction of sin for what it is and be drawn to the light of Christ.
• I know that God understands what I’m going through. The Father sent His beloved Son into this world to walk through every conceivable pain and tragedy and all the way the cross. He knows what it’s like to place His child in peril and grow up surrounded by evil.
• I believe that broken communities needs to see God’s way of doing family. If Christians aren’t willing to raise kids in these places then HOW will any of the families ever get to witness the power of of a gospel-centric family?
• Trouble increases my urgency to share the gospel with my kids. Days like yesterday make me desperate to pray for my kids, with my kids, and to teach and demonstrate the gospel to them. Interestingly, while there’s a lot more police, social workers, abused kids and chaos than I’d like – it means that we get to talk about these things with our kids and help them to process things from a gospel perspective. Furthermore, it never ceases to bless me when one of my kids responds to something they’ve seen or heard in church, school or on the street by asking “Daddy can we pray for my friend…?”
• There are some buzzin’ promises in the Bible, such as: “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22v6
• There’s no guarantee that they’d be safer anywhere else. The truth is that child abuse, drugs, bullying, crime, domestic violence, broken homes etc. are not confined to council estates. Sin is sin. Satan is Satan. We need to trust Jesus with our kids wherever we live. The safest place for my family is to remain in the centre of God’s will.

They’re just a few tired thoughts. I’d be very interested to know where others land on this issue.

The second reason for posting this, however, is to simply ask you to pray for us, for our kids and for all parents who are seeking to live, serve and raise their kids in the midst of difficult and dangerous communities for the sake of Jesus. Furthermore, if you want me to pray for you and your kids, post a comment below and it’d be my pleasure to pray for you – trust me – I’m in the mood right now!!